The Polyvagal Ladder: Understanding Your Nervous System
Written for Through the Woods Psychology by Rebekah Sebbelov
Have you ever felt like you are doing your best, and your body just will not cooperate? Maybe your mind says you are fine, but your chest is tight, your thoughts are racing, or everything suddenly feels heavy and distant. If that sounds familiar, if may be that your body is trying to protect you.
Polyvagal Theory offers a compassionate way to understand these experiences. Your nervous system is always asking one simple question: Am I safe? It answers this automatically, without conscious thought. Based on that answer, your body shifts into different states. These shifts are not choices or failures. They are your body’s way of protecting you.
Meet the Polyvagal Ladder!
Imagine your nervous system like a ladder with three main levels. We move up and down this ladder throughout the day, often without realizing it.
Top rung: Safe and connected
At the top of the ladder is a state of safety and connection, often called the ventral vagal state. This is where you feel calm, present, and able to connect with others.
Your breathing is steady, your body feels more at ease, and your thinking is clearer. This is where conversations flow more naturally, where learning happens, and where healing is most accessible. It is not realistic to stay here all the time, but it is a place your system knows how to return to.
Middle rung: Fight or flight
In the middle of the ladder is the fight or flight state, also known as the sympathetic state. This is where your body becomes activated and ready for action.
You might feel anxious, restless, irritable, or overwhelmed. Your heart rate may increase, your muscles may tighten, and your breathing may become shallow. This state is not negative. It helps you respond to challenges, meet demands, and take action. However, when your system stays here too long, it can feel like chronic anxiety or burnout.
Bottom rung: Shutdown
At the bottom of the ladder is the shutdown state, sometimes called the dorsal vagal state. When your system perceives something as too overwhelming, it may move into this protective mode.
You might feel numb, disconnected, exhausted, or foggy. Some people describe this as feeling stuck, flat, or like they have checked out. This state can be unsettling, but it is also a form of protection. Your body is conserving energy and trying to keep you safe when things feel like too much.
We all move between these states, often many times in a single day. You might feel calm in the morning, activated during a stressful interaction, and then drained later on. This is not a sign that something is wrong. It is a sign that your nervous system is responsive and doing its job. One of the most helpful shifts this model offers is a change in perspective.
Instead of asking what is wrong with me, you can begin to ask where am I on the ladder right now?
This question invites curiosity and reduces self-judgement. It creates a bit of space between you and your experience. When you are in a survival state such as fight or flight or shutdown, your thinking brain is less accessible. This means you cannot simply think your way out of it. Your body needs support before you are able to use your insight. There are simple ways to support your nervous system and help it move toward a greater sense of safety.
If you are feeling anxious or activated — try slowing your breathing with a longer exhale, pressing your feet into the ground, or gently orienting to your surroundings by naming what you can see.
If you are feeling shut down—small amounts of movement, warmth, or sensory input can help bring energy back into your system.
If you are already feeling calm—take a moment to notice it. Let your body register that sense of safety.
We do not regulate alone! One of the most important ideas in Polyvagal Theory is that we are wired for connection. Your nervous system responds to cues of safety from others, such as a kind tone of voice, eye contact, or feeling understood. This is called co-regulation, and it plays a powerful role in healing. Understanding the polyvagal ladder can help you make sense of emotional shifts, respond to yourself with more compassion, and support others more effectively. It reminds us that mental health is not only about thoughts. It is also about what is happening in the body. You are not broken. You are adaptive. Your nervous system has been working, often quietly and consistently, to protect you.
The goal is not to eliminate these states, but to notice them and gently support your way back toward connection.
At Through the Woods Psychology in Calgary, we not only have psychologists and counsellors but also counselling therapist interns that can offer low-cost or no-cost therapy to those who are unable to afford sessions or do not have insurance. Sessions are done in person or online.
Visit our website to learn more or to book your free consultation today. You can also get in touch by email at info@throughthewoods.ca or phone at (403) 984-7922.
Additional Resources on Polyvagal Theory:
· Stephen Porges Resources
References
Porges, S. W. (2022). Polyvagal safety: Attachment, communication, self-regulation, and the autonomic nervous system. W. W. Norton & Company.
Dana, D. (2021). Anchored: How to befriend your nervous system using polyvagal theory.
Dana, D., & Porges, S. W. (2018). The revolutionary power of the polyvagal theory: Feel safer, connected, and confident in your life. Sounds True.